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阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。
It was summer, and my dad wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before. He decided to take me on a trip to the Wild West.
We took a plane to Albuquerque, a big city in the state of New Mexico. We reached Albuquerque in the late afternoon. Uncle Paul, my dad’s friend, picked us up from the airport and drove us up to his farm in Pecos.
His wife Tina cooked us a delicious dinner and we got to know his sons Ryan and Kyle. My dad and I spent the night in the guestroom of the farm house listening to the frogs and water rolling down the river nearby. Very early in the morning, Uncle Paul woke us up to have breakfast. “The day starts at dawn on my farm,” he said. After breakfast, I went to help Aunt Tina feed the chickens, while my dad went with Uncle Paul to take the sheepout to graze (吃草). I was impressed to see my dad and Uncle Paul riding horses. They looked really cool.
In the afternoon, I asked Uncle Paul if I could take a horse ride, and he said yes, as long as my dad went with me. I wasn’t going to take a horse ride by myself anyway. So, my dad and I put on our new cowboy hats, got on our horses, and headed slowly towards the mountains. “Don’t be late for supper,” Uncle Paul cried, “and keep to the track so that you don’t get lost!” “OK!” my dad cried back. After a while Uncle Paul and his farm house were out of sight. It was so peaceful and quiet and the colors of the brown rocks, the deep green pine trees, and the late afternoon sun mixed to create a magic scene. It looked like a beautiful woven (编织的) blanket spread out upon the ground just for us.
注意:
1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右;
2. 至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语;
3. 续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好;
4. 续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph 1:
Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.
Paragraph 2:
We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.
要是没有划线词就不用划线词,顺着我们的方法接着走就行。
先进步,通读全文,注意划线词,确定较终主题
这篇文章肯定是记叙文,记叙文主题一般是首尾相加,但是续写的尾段是要你自己写的。所以续写评价你跑不跑题,或者说为了让你不跑题给你条件上的暗示。首段就给你出主旨。
所以想都不用想----短文续写的作文主旨就直接看先进段就行。
It was summer, and my dad wanted to treat me to a vacation like never before. He decided to take me on a trip to the Wild West.
在这个夏天,我的父亲带我去了一次我从未体验过的旅行,他决定带我去 Wild West这个地方旅行。
根据这个,我们其实可以直接确定较后一句话了。
肯定是一个感叹句---这是一个多么我从来没经历过的假期
What a vacation that I have never experience before !
所以技巧1,首段认真读,读完首段直接用感叹句扣较后一句
技巧2,接着读,尽量读懂,不用读懂详细信息。
因为读懂了也没什么用.只用大致信息5w1h就够分析我们要续写的内容【没有划线词的题】
如果有划线词,需要对划线词部分留意。
We took a plane to Albuquerque, a big city in the state of New Mexico. We reached Albuquerque in the late afternoon. Uncle Paul, my dad’s friend, picked us up from the airport and drove us up to his farm in Pecos.
我们坐飞机去了...我们到达了xx见到了我的叔叔。注意Uncle Paul 我爸的朋友,带着我们离开了机场去了他的农场.
His wife Tina cooked us a delicious dinner and we got to know his sons Ryan and Kyle. My dad and I spent the night in the guestroom of the farm house listening to the frogs and water rolling down the river nearby. Very early in the morning, Uncle Paul woke us up to have breakfast. “The day starts at dawn on my farm,” he said. After breakfast, I went to help Aunt Tina feed the chickens, while my dad went with Uncle Paul to take the sheepout to graze (吃草). I was impressed to see my dad and Uncle Paul riding horses. They looked really cool.
他的妻子,做了一顿饭。然后......,然后我们花了一整晚在农场客人的房间听了....这附近还有个河。【对于有划线词的其实较简单就是只看有划线词的句子。其余都没什么用】之后叫醒早餐................早餐之后,我去帮助我的姑姑去喂鸡。同时我爸和我叔叔一起去赶着羊吃草我很印象深刻的就是骑马.......
In the afternoon, I asked Uncle Paul if I could take a horse ride, and he said yes, as long as my dad went with me. I wasn’t going to take a horse ride by myself anyway. So, my dad and I put on our new cowboy hats, got on our horses, and headed slowly towards the mountains. “Don’t be late for supper,” Uncle Paul cried, “and keep to the track so that you don’t get lost!” “OK!” my dad cried back. After a while Uncle Paul and his farm house were out of sight. It was so peaceful and quiet and the colors of the brown rocks, the deep green pine trees, and the late afternoon sun mixed to create a magic scene. It looked like a beautiful woven (编织的) blanket spread out upon the ground just for us.
下午的时候我问我能不能骑马,他说可以,只要我爸陪我一块去,我无论如何都不能自己一个人骑着马,所以就走了.............叔叔喊到,在吃晚饭的点之前回来【那较后结果肯定是晚了】而且保持轨迹,不要迷失。【那么这个套路他肯定是要迷路啊】
一会他叔叔和他的农场都看不见了。【后面全是风景描写,没有意义,就不用看了】
把所有的划线词抄下来,
dad Uncle Paul farm house river feed sheep late track get lost sight
之后我们看题目
进行第二步,读续写各段首句,确定较终套路
Paragraph 1:
Suddenly a little rabbit jumped out in front of my horse.
突然一只小兔子跑到我的马面前
Paragraph 2:
We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark.
我们不知道去哪了,而且天越来越黑了.【这肯定是迷路了】
前面来了个兔子,后面就迷路了。
那么先进段出事了,结果是迷路了。第二段就是解决了。
这个套路就是先进段出事了,第二段解决了。
好,现在继续按我们的解题步骤来。
第三步,结合套路和划线词,开始打汉语草稿。
【如果没有划线词,就直接顺着给出的续写各段首句,直接造简单句,打汉语草稿】
划线词:
dad Uncle Paul farm house river feed sheep late track get lost sight
然后我们从兔子→迷路,得出两个问题
1,怎么迷路?【先进段】
2,迷路之后怎么解决?【第二段】
那先进个问题肯定是在追兔子的时候迷路了。至于怎么迷路不用管,
这个问题能用到的词汇是:dad get lost sight【景色,我们可以在迷路的时候看到很多景色,比如全是树】
这三个写完没什么写的时候,我们还可以用感受--心理活动来凑。然后往别的词上面靠。我担心我的叔叔保罗让我不要be late 对晚饭迟到。
不要晚于xxx时间点到农场这个地点farm house。
Uncle Paul late farm house关联上。
第二个问题,我不知道我们在哪里,我们是不是需要找到路?要按照原来的路吗?
肯定要用track【轨迹】river【之前那个河,那是家门口的暗示】
文中已经说过现在天黑了,那么天黑darkness导致我们无法找到原来的路,那就绝望了,这就是所谓的就出现波折了。按照河流就可以走回去.
沿着这个河啊,肯定就能看到我们喂羊feed sheep的地方。【没说划线词不能放在一起啊】
较后还是late,较后感慨一句,真是难忘的经历啊.
就是开脑洞。
汉语草稿完了。就开始写。进入第四步,简单句子翻译+句型升级【小作文】
爸爸和我因为这只兔子很可爱,所以才追,因为所以,用so that这个句型升级状语从句。
Dad and I found that it was so cute that we chased it immediately
下一句就该我们迷路了。
We got lost 【这个时候就要开始加内容,升级】我是在森林里迷路的。仅仅在十分钟之后。这种简单的句子可以改成强调句。而且这还是个不幸的事情。
Unfortunately,It was only after ten minutes of chasing that we got lost in the forest
这里补充一种强调句的改写方法,即如果一个名词前面有介词,即结构是介词+宾语。
即介宾短语,强调的时候必须一起强调。常常出现在表时间表地点上面。原句其他的东西放在后面顺着抄下来就行。
即it is/was 介词+名词 that.....................
我们看到了的景色,全是树。
There was nothing in our sight but the trees.
我想起了我们答应uncle 保罗说要吃晚饭前回去,我肯定感觉内疚sorry→紧张nervous。
I felt nervous and sorry when I remembered that I had promised Uncle Paul not to be late to go back to farm house and have supper.
其实句型升级不重要,关键要学会这个思路
其实已经够长了,如果不够长还可以开脑洞。什么又累又饿巴拉巴拉...
Dad and I found that it was so cute that we chased it immediately.Unfortunately,It was only after ten minutes of chasing that we got lost in the forest. There was nothing in our sight but the trees.
I felt nervous and sorry when I remembered that I had promised Uncle Paul not to be late to go back to farm house and have supper.
第二段:
要注意连贯。
We had no idea where we were and it was getting dark. 【题目给的条件】
所以肯定是这个黑暗,让我们找不到回来的路
The darkness made it impossible to find the tracks.【找到这个路,什么样的路,这句话可以升级一个定语从句,用就是track:轨迹,路,我们之前走的路。即我们之前制造的轨迹】
The darkness made it impossible to find the tracks that we had made.
幸运的是爸爸有个主意【根据我们之前的草稿,我们这个时候该绝望了,该转折了。那就一手无中生有,爸爸提出了某个主意。用luckily,表转折,然后就说出沿河就能走回去.】
Luckily,my dad got an idea :“Do not be worry. There is a river near the farm house. Find the river ,follow the river and we can back to farm house.”
较后,我就穿过一个地方【刚好用定语从句】什么样的地方?之前喂羊的地方,就找到水,回到了农场。我们肯定晚了,啊!!真是难忘的假期啊~
Finally ,going through the place where we fed sheep before, we found the river and went back to home. There was no doubt that we were late for dinner. And , well , what a vacation that I have never experience before !
我们肯定晚了这个地方还可以在升级一下。用there is no doubt that这个句型就行。
.................... Dad and I found that it was so cute that we chased it immediately.Unfortunately,It was only after ten minutes of chasing that we got lost in the forest .There was nothing in our sight but the trees.I felt nervous and sorry when I remembered that I had promised Uncle Paul not to be late to go back to farm house and have supper.
.................... The darkness made it impossible to find the tracks that we had made.Luckily,my dad got an idea :“Do not be worry. There is a river near the farm house. Find the river ,follow the river and we can back to farm house.”Finally ,going through the place where we fed sheep before, we found the river and went back to home. There was no doubt that we were late for dinner. And , well , what a vacation that I have never experience before !
dad Uncle Paul farm house river feed sheep late track get lost sight
这些词又不互斥,给出肯定是可以用的,当然可以全用。
我都用了,举例子嘛,如果我不全用,你们学到的就更少。
较后作文续写一定要大胆的训练,然后让老师改,不然你只是看着我弄得很容易,自己一写就发蒙。
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